People who use internet dating to find a date are usually pretty well versed in how to keep their nerves from showing. When meeting someone for the first time it’s natural for our stomachs to be full of butterflies! So we’re good, but what can you do when your date is not so at ease? Read on for some tips;
The thing about someone being overly nervous is that it gets in the way of communication. Since a first date is all about getting to better know someone, it stands to reason that those nerves may put a damper on that. Your date may very well be excited about finally meeting you, but it’s obvious that he or she is finding the whole thing just a tad overwhelming.
Usually I approach this head on, in a kind and non critical way. Simply acknowledge that you understand their nervousness and admit that you feel the same way (even if you don’t, it’s kinder this way). Suggest to your date that you both put those feelings aside. Recommend that you both lighten up a bit and have some fun, then lead by example.
With any luck your date will follow your lead and you can get down to the business of dating. But what if your date doesn’t follow suit? Well, you can only do so much. You’re here to have fun not a therapy session. If your date remains cool, don’t be rude about it, but do plan on making it an early night. There’s one of two things happening here; he or she is always cool and reserved, or they just need more time to warm up.
Okay, you’ve dealt with the nerves and the two of you are actually talking! Congrats. About an hour into the date, you discover that your date is actually a bit of a jerk. No, make that a total jerk.
You don’t get it: he’s such a good on paper guy, what with his job working with animals and his stories about his nieces and nephews who love him so much but then you meet in real life and wow, he’s kind of a jerk. Not necessarily to you or to his best friend or his mother or anything, but to random people, like waiters and valets. Suddenly the man who was so sweet and charming in his emails to you is snapping at a stranger for bumping into him in line.
These are the kind of things you just can’t predict. His or her annoyance may not be directed towards you, but their behavior is enough to raise red flags. There is always the possibility that sooner or later their anger is going to be direct at you. There are definitely some deeper issues here that this person needs to resolve.
Now this may sound a bit callous but here’s the thing. Dating someone with anger issues is like going to the pet store and buying a puppy or a kitten knowing that it’s already sick. Sure, you can get a healthy one that may develop issues down the road, but at the very least you should shop around until you find the healthiest one possible.
This post was developed by the writers of the Datepad.com internet dating company where you can find hundreds of helpful dating posts. You can get a unique content version of this article from the Uber Article Directory.